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Service Human and Divine To wish to serve humanity, to do good
to it shows ambition and egoism? How? Why do you wish to serve
humanity? What is your purpose? What is your motive? Do you know in what consists the good of humanity? And do you know better than
humanity itself what is good for it? Or do you know it better than the Divine?
You say the Divine is everywhere, so if you serve humanity, it is the Divine
whom you serve. Well, if the Divine is everywhere, he is in you too; so the
best and the most logical thing should be to begin by serving yourself. Is
there then no need for service to humanity? Hospitals, nursing organisations, charitable
institutions have not been useful to humanity? Has not the spirit of
philanthropy mended and improved the conditions of human life? Has
it, I ask? You have tried to help a few people here and there. But what does it
amount to compared to what needs to be done? The proverbial drop in the ocean
or less than that even. You remember the story of St. Vincent de Paul? He began
giving alms to the poor. On the first day there were ten, on the second some
twenty, on the third more than fifty and the number went on swelling in more
than geometrical progression. And then? Colbert, the
King's Minister, remarked seeing the plight of the saint: "Our brother
seems to be giving birth endlessly to his poor people". I do
not think that the spirit of charity has in any way improved human conditions.
I do not see that men have become either more or less subject to disease and
indigence than before. Charity was always there and misery has coexisted with
it ever. I do not think the ratio between the two has diminished in any way.
You remember the ironical but
Page – 411 pertinent remark of someone who said in view of science's
attempts to cure and remove misery: "Poor philanthropists would be in a
sad plight, their occupation will go!" The true reason why one wishes to
do charity is elsewhere, it is to please oneself, it
is for self-satisfaction. It amuses you to do the thing: it gives you the sense
that you are doing something, that you are a valuable member of humanity, not
like the others, that you are somebody. What else all that is except that you
are vain, full of self-importance, full of yourself? That is what I meant when
I said that it is ambition or egoism that makes you humanitarian. Of course, if
it pleases you to do the work, if you feel happy in doing it, you are at
perfect liberty to do the work and continue. But do not imagine that you are
doing any real or effective service to humanity; particularly do not imagine
that by that you are serving God, leading a spiritual life or doing Yoga. Just an illustration of the quality of the spirit that animates
humanitarianism. A charitable man will give generously for a thing that
is known, recognised, appreciated; he will be liberal if he finds his name
attached to the work, announced and pronounced, if there is fame for him in it.
But ask him a dole for something genuine, comparatively modest or out of the
way, something that is truly spiritual and divine, you will find his
purse-strings tightened, his heart closed up. A gift that bears no value to the
giver does not tempt the ordinary humanitarian. There is indeed another
different category of givers, of the opposite kind, who want precisely to remain
anonymous: they would be displeased if their names were announced. But the
motive here too is not very different; in fact it is the same motive acting à rebours, backward
as it were. Here there is an additional element of self-glorification: one
gives and people do not know who he is; it is something all the more to be
proud of. You
must look into yourself, question yourself before" you do a thing and not
do it simply because it is the thing normally done and it is how things are
normally done. You can do good to others, if you know
what is that good and if you possess that in yourself. If you wish to help
others, you must be on a higher level than that of theirs. If you are one with
the others, level with them in nature and consciousness, what can you do but
Page – 412 share in their ignorance and blind movements and perpetuate
them? So it happens really that the first thing to do is to serve yourself. You
will make a remarkable discovery as you proceed to know what you are and who
you are. That is how you should begin. "I want to serve humanity. How can
I serve? Who is this 'I' that wants to serve?" You say, "I am such a
person, this form and this name." But the form you have now was not there
when you were a baby: it has been changing constantly All
the elements of your body are being renewed totally. Neither are your sensations
and feelings those you had a few years ago. Your thoughts and ideas have
undergone revolutions. The "I" covers a sum of ever-changing
factors. There is nothing particularly to be called "I"
: it is only a ring of changes. An empty name seems to be the only
constant thing. One element at a time comes forward – an idea, a feeling, an Impulse – and
that is your "I" for the moment. At another moment another element
comes up and becomes your "I". You are not one "I" but a
crowd of many "I"s. So what is the value of
the declaration of one of the 1's that it has found the goal, the truth, the duty you have to follow? Thus if you
proceed further, questioning and analysing yourself thoroughly and sincerely, you will stumble
upon the reality. You will find that "I" does not exist at
all. What exists is something else: it is the one indivisible reality, the
Divine alone. It
is this self-discovery that will give you the basic knowledge, the foundation
of your life, the discovery that your self as yourself
does not exist, you are indeed nothing. This sense of nothingness must pervade
your being, fill all the elements of your being before the truth can dawn upon
you and the Divine Presence can be felt. And what you have been doing all along
is the very contrary thing, asserting your egoism, your vanity – pretending
that you were somebody, you could do something, that
the world needed your help and you could give that help. Nothing
of the kind. When you discover this truth and accept it, when you are
humbled and in true humility you approach life and reality, you will find your
real career and vocation. In
a deeper sense it is indeed by serving yourself that you serve others best.
When you discover a dark spot in you, a grain of egoism, ambition, selfishness,
when you do not yield
Page – 413 to its
impulsion but surmount it, when you thus conquer in yourself a movement that
leads you astray, in the same gesture you make the conquest for the sake of
others too, you create the same possibility in others. There can be nothing
more dynamic than this setting of personal example. It is not that others
observe you and imitate you; the influence is more subtle and more powerful.
You create the opportunity, make an opening, bring into active play the force
of your realisation, even without the knowledge of others; the others are only
benefited by the invisible help that is lent to them. But you must be on your
guard here too. You must not say, "1 will help others, so let me improve
myself". There should not be any such spirit of barter or bargain. Confine
yourself to your own business; how others are affected or not affected is not
your concern. If you entertain that kind of idea, you invite the same vanity
and egoism, by the back door. Yours should be like the blooming of a flower; it
blooms out of its own joy and delight of self-fulfilment; in the process, by
its very existence it spreads its perfume all around, fills the surroundings
with its glad vibration, but that simply happens, it does not do all that
purposely or intentionally. Even so the soul that perfects himself:
the victory he wins for himself is contagious and extends automatically. I have said your ego is an illusion. Your "I" does not exist at all. There is nothing like separate, distinct individualities and individual fulfilment. The Divine alone exists and the Divine's Will. He is the single and unique and all-embracing reality. What then is the source of this variety and diversity of existence? What is the significance, if any, of the many individualities and personalities, their appearance and play on the world-stage? That
is another story. I leave it for a future occasion.
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